2009-08-21

The swine and BBVPI

Mumbai 21st August 2009: There has been an uproar in the BBVPI (Board of Bacteria, Viruses and Pathogens of India) with regards to Swine Flu Virus or more commonly known as H1N1. Mr. Plasmodium said in an exclusive interview that the other Viruses were enraged at the undue attention recieved by H1N1. Mr. Influenza said, "The committee is planning to sue AAJTAK and Times Of India for creating so much hype for H1N1. Due to this people go everywhere wearing masks. This has made it difficult for us to earn a decent livilihood nowadays." The committee is very angry at H1N1 family too. "They have invaded our jobs and are killing our hosts", said Mr. Vibrio cholerae. Mr Plasmodium "Attention seeker" Falciparum said in another statement, " How many more do I have to kill before I get in the papers." The committee has decided to undertake a non-coooperation with H1N1. " First Bird Flu and now Swine Flu. Why cant they keep to their own hosts?",said Mr.HIV. But the induction of HIV into the committee is very controversial as it was earlier a chimpanzee host. Rumors are around that HIV threatened to murder all viruses, bacteria and parasites in th hosts infected by it unless it was inducted in the committee. When asked, Mr. Influenza said ,"That is not the matter at hand now. We first need to take care of H1N1 now." Mr. HIV has agreed not to attack the immune system of Swine flu infected people. "We want to weed out H1N1 just like H5N1 before it gets out of hand.", said Mr.HIV.

Lets see what happens next. The next few months will be crucial.
This is The Dark Knight reporting from BBVPI headquarters, Dharavi, Mumbai, India.